Relationships Worth More Than Money Podcast
Conversations about relationships being valuable and worth more than money! its a heartwarming podcast that delves into the profound value of connections, friendships, and love that transcend the monetary realm. Hosted by Tweezy & a diverse range of guests, including athletes, artists, entrepreneurs, engineers and everyday people, each episode explores the immeasurable worth of relationships in our lives. Through compelling stories and thought-provoking discussions, the podcast inspires listeners to cherish the bonds they share with others, reminding us that the wealth of a meaningful relationship is far more precious than any currency. Tune in to "Relationships worth more than money" to discover the true treasure in life.
Relationships Worth More Than Money Podcast
From Military Missions to Family Trials: A Journey of Resilience and Forgiveness
Become a Relative & send some love
What if the hardest battles you face are not on the battlefield but at home, within your own family? Walk with me through a narrative shaped by love, family values, and the unwavering call of duty. Raised by the guiding hands of my grandparents, I once dreamed of playing baseball for Norfolk State, only to have my path altered by the persistent encouragement of Marine Staff Sergeant Robinson. This pivotal choice led me to the Marine Corps, a decision forged in conversations with my parents, blending family legacy with personal ambition.
Experience the raw and unfiltered journey of transitioning to military life and the profound transformations that come with it. From the trials of boot camp at Parris Island to the camaraderie and heartache in Iraq, every chapter reveals a piece of my soul. The bonds formed, the lessons learned, and the emotional scars acquired in the heat of combat paint a vivid picture of resilience. Yet, upon returning home, the battle shifted to one of financial betrayal, a stark and painful reminder of vulnerability that left me grappling with anger and loss within my own family circle.
As life marched on, so did the challenges. From the unexpected end of my Marine Corps career to navigating the complexities of divorce and co-parenting, the journey taught me to prioritize personal peace, even amidst chaos. A turning point came with setting boundaries, embracing forgiveness, and finding new solace in podcasting. The support of loyal friends and my own growth paved the way to healing and self-discovery. Join me in exploring the intricate dance of maintaining relationships worth more than money, and the relentless pursuit of peace in a world that often tests the limits of our endurance.
Relationships Worth More Than Money by Tweezy Kennedy & Marcus Alland
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yeah, we back. Happy new year. Um, first and foremost, man, thank everybody that's been been rocking with me and and relationships worth more Than Money podcast, from 2023, when I first started it, to 2024 and now 25. Deuce Nicks but, yeah, man, this Air Force Army and I know they might have went through this, but I know also a civilian might have experienced these same things. So I just want to start off off the back.
Speaker 1:I was raised off love. Ok, johnny Cecil Kennedy, willie Esther Kennedy, my grandparents on my dad's side, betty, sue Jordan, clyde Jordan, on my mom's side, was always raised off love. God first and family. Everything else that's whatever comes with it when you build your own family and things of that nature If you got hobbies, jobs, whatever that you love, but them two God and family was always prevalent and key to our family. But I hung more on my dad's side of the family and I learned a lot from my grandma, my grandfather and my aunts and uncles. But I just want to start this off now by saying I was raised off love. Okay, that's how I know how to handle things, but I'm just going to get you the rundown on how everything started with me and why I'm starting this so you can get the story from day one of me in high school.
Speaker 1:Of me in high school, uh, 2002 to 2003,. I was a senior at uh Osborne high school, seven mile East side, um, if you know. You know um, but my goal was to go play baseball at Norfolk state. I didn't get the chance to go to black colleges, black college tours, like my brother did, I don't know for what reason, I don't know. I didn't get to do a lot of things as the second child, second baby, the boy from my mom. My grades were great. My grades were great, my grades were outstanding until the last, like report card before I graduated. I was just caught senioritis real quick. But in that time around, like 2003, I took the ASVAB and our Army dude just kept hassling me. He kept hassling me and I didn't really like how he was bothering me. And much respect to the army, I love all the military branches, so let's, let's start there. But it was something about the army guy that just didn't sit well with me and I rest in peace to him because he ended up passing away. Just didn't sit well with me and I and rest in peace to him Cause he ended up passing away. Um, it's crazy. Uh, he was actually the guy that got into it with proof um from D12, if I'm not mistaken. And um, he passed away um off on eight mile. Um, but that's further. That's, that's neither here nor there. Rest in peace to him.
Speaker 1:But I was in one of my I think it was my co-op class. It was a co-op, I think, because I had a 104, my senior year, and my teacher. It was a knock at the door and I couldn't really see because, you know, our doors had the little slick glasses on the side of each door. So I couldn't really see because, you know, like our doors had like the little slit glasses on the side of each door, so I couldn't really tell who it was. But a guy asked to speak to me like yo, can I speak to Antoine Kennedy? And my teacher was like, yeah, go right ahead. So I stepped outside.
Speaker 1:It's a Marine, staff Sergeant Robinson. Never forget him. Shout out to Staff Sergeant Robinson, I forget him. Shout out to Staff Sergeant Robinson. I'm pretty sure he retired as a gunny or something higher, but for sure Staff Sergeant Robinson was one of the coolest Marines I ever met and he kept it cut and dry with me from day one. So he was like, hey yo, what's up? Antoine, man, I know you're the captain on the baseball team, I know you want to go to Norfolk State, but if nothing works out for you, we would like to have you here at the Marine Corps in the Marine Corps. And I was like man, y'all the dudes that be fighting the dragons. He's like, man, that's just a commercial, he's like. But we do get it in, but it ain't no dragons. He commercial, he's like, but we do get it in, but it ain't no dragons, he's like. And it also depends on your job, your MOS. And I was like, oh, okay, I was like man, I'll take some thought into it, you know.
Speaker 1:Let me go back and talk to my mom, because I was always one of the kids that I always tried to bring stuff up to my parents. And previously, around 2001, 2002, my dad always said you either enroll or enlist. And I'm like at the time I don't understand, like, what do you mean, enroll or enlist? I can't do both. I can't enroll in college and enlist in college. What do you mean? I never asked him that, but it didn't make sense to me until when a Marine recruiter came. I'm like, oh, that's what he was talking about. You know your brain. You know people always say male brains mature slower than women brains. But yeah, I didn't catch on to that.
Speaker 1:So after I spoke with Staff Sergeant Robinson, I came home, talked to my mom Like mom, I think I want to look into the Marines. And she was looking at me like boy know the F, you ain't Like you can start cussing me out and stuff. You ain't finna fight no white man's war. And I'm like whoa, when did race get into this? Like I don't see no color, like what are you talking about? But, mind you, her father, my grandfather, clyde B Jordan. Clyde Jordan was in the Navy and the Air Force and all his kids were born wherever he was stationed at in Texas, austin, san Antonio. You know what I'm saying. Some of my aunts is from Texas, some of my aunts from Florida, like wherever he was stationed at. And he's from Pensacola. My grandmother is from Pensacola, baker area, and it didn't make sense to me. And my grandfather on my father's side was a World War II veteran.
Speaker 1:So I was kind of lost in the sauce. I'm like why I was getting cussed out. So we I just go in my room, do whatever I do when I I don't know carried on the rest of my day of you know, after speaking to my mom and she wasn't accepting of it. But in the back of my mind I was like yo, I'm joining. So I started recruiting my homies. You can ask anybody. You can ask Chris, chris Love, he in the Air Force right now. You can ask Marcus Jackson, you can ask Pierre, you can ask Ruel, you can ask Marcus Winfield, you can ask Justin Goffin, you can ask Justin Jackson. All the homies. For real, I was really Miguel.
Speaker 1:I was trying to recruit all of us from the hood, from the eight. Like you know, we was from the eight. So you know what I'm saying. They like nah, bro, keith, keith High, rest in peace to Keith High. I was trying to recruit them. You know what I'm saying. They're like nah, bro, keith High, rest in peace to Keith High. I was trying to recruit them. You know what I'm saying. I'm like bro, let's go. Like this joint is going to be dope if we all go, but it's a few considered I ain't going to lie C-Love, c-love definitely considered. But him and Mark Jack, they were going to do the police force and they ended up doing that. And then I think something happened and C-Love ended up going to the Air Force and Mark Jack ended up still fighting through and getting to becoming a police officer.
Speaker 1:But for me, marcus Winfield bro, best friend and Justin Goffin, we all was like yo, let's do it. So you know, staff Sergeant Robinson came. I brought Staff Sergeant Robinson to introduce him to Justin and his mom she was on board Took him over to Marcus' mom and dad house. They were on board. So I'm like boom, I got my two people, I can get promoted If you know. You know you get two people in with you. You become a private first class PFC instead of a private out the gate. So you're getting paid a little bit more. You know what I'm saying out the gate versus being a private. So you got a little extra promotion. So I'm already thinking fast on, like you know, people who to get.
Speaker 1:And it was just like I just wanted to get my homies out the hood, cause I knew me personally like, um, the way that, the way it was going, I ain't see us making it out. So, um, both, both of them was on board. My mom still wasn't on board. So I told Staff Sergeant Robinson hey, man, when I turn 18, I'm coming to sign them papers. So I kept my word.
Speaker 1:You know, I just had my senior summer party, had fun, and as soon as September 19th came, 2003, I signed them papers and know I'm hype, you know I'm ready. I'm like, hey, got my date, I'm leaving january. We all leaving january 6th, I believe, january 5th, january 6, 2004. That I'm ready. You know I'm saying'm saying we was just prepping, prepping in the pool function, in the pool man, just, you know, meeting new people that was joining with us from the recruiting station on Nine Mile. It's not even there, no more, right by East Detroit, if you know. You know, but yeah, I'm prepping In my mind. I already know I'm going to the Marines, ain't nothing. Nobody can tell me. So, yeah, we ready to go January come.
Speaker 1:Oh, I come back from taking the signing my papers and stuff. I tell my mom like mom, I'm joining the Marines, I leave January 2004. She's like no, you not, you ain't joining nothing. I'm like I already signed the papers. She's like what, go to your room, you on punishment. I'm like yo, punishment, I'm 18, yo, punishment, I'm 18. What are you talking about? She's like you live in my house, you on punishment. So I called my brother up. I said yo, bro, come get me. Man, that's Dot Trip, that's what we call her mom. Right, he picked me up. I swindled my way out of being on punishment because I just stayed with him.
Speaker 1:Mind you, my whole 2003 year I was pretty much on my own when it came to like everything, everything Outside of like pictures, senior pictures my mom paid for. I was on my own, like fixing my food and stuff like that, working and so yeah. So when I graduated, my mom I got a job. She started charging me rent and I'm just like man, this is crazy. I should have left. Now. What is going on? Why am I getting charged rent? And every time I got paid I had to pay her a portion of it. So I didn't like it, and so you know, I just couldn't wait till the day January 2004 came.
Speaker 1:After January came, I left, went to the Marine Corps. Mind you, I got all my notes right here, so I'm just going over it. So I don't want y'all thinking I'm just looking over. What is he looking at over here? Got my iPad over here, but yeah, so January 2004,. Boom, I'm on a plane, never flew a plane. I'm going to Parris Island, south Carolina, becoming a Marine Journalist, tried to get on a bus, started yelling at us Three months with 100 other individuals who became brothers and the sad part was I was supposed to be a con wireman and I was already ready to go for January 6th.
Speaker 1:So me and Marcus was wiremen and Justin, I believe, was a combat engineer. Our paperwork got messed up for the wiremen. So I said yo, staff Sergeant, what do I got to do to still keep my date? Because I ain't trying to get pushed back. Pause, I ain't trying to get pushed back on the date. He was like man. The only way you can do that is if you go open contract. So I said what's that? He's like man. You're like a free agent to the Marine Corps and wherever they see fit they see you better at, they're going to put you into that job so you can be any of the 300 and something jobs in the Marine Corps. I said, cool, bet, let me do that. He's like all right, sign here, sign there. I end up leaving Me and Justin end up leaving. Marcus left a week later.
Speaker 1:So now we're not on the buddy system like we was supposed to be and I didn't get my PFC because Justin had signed up before I did my PFC, because Justin had signed up before I did so I only had a half promotion-like certificate that they gave me, which didn't mean nothing because I didn't become a PFC until six months later. So we get to boot camp, me and Justin, boom, me and Justin thugging it out, swim call first month, learning how to march, learning to drill. Second month we get to the rifle range, rifle range come. We actually training with women now. So now we like dang these women, like damn, that's what they look like. Of course, you know our drilling structures is putting all the negative stuff in our head, like they're, they're nasty, they don't wash up, and I'm sure the women feet, uh, women, uh, drilling structures do the same thing.
Speaker 1:But uh, my boy, justin, tried to be slick in a child hall hall one day and I don't know, I guess because we was on a range and we was pulling pits and stuff like that with the female Marines, he decided to try to one-up and drop his number not even his number, drop his boot cap address on a napkin when we was leaving out the chow hall and the women were coming in and the female drill instructor, seeing he dropped some trash and you know how drill instructors are about cleanliness she picked it up like hey, recruit, you dropped your trash. And when she picked it up it like opened. She said oh this what we doing? Man, my boy, justin, got smoked on that quarter deck. I ain't never seen a quarter deck steam like the windows was steaming.
Speaker 1:But later on that week, justin I'm sure he not going to be mad at me for telling him this, but Justin, we was at the firing line and every time you get off the firing line you're supposed to condition, you're supposed to show clear. Pretty much condition four show clear, pull the magazine out, rack the M16 back, make sure you don't have no round in the chamber, and whatever round if it pops out, put that round back in your magazine, but make sure that your weapon on safe ejection port cover closed. All of that right Still in me, right? But yeah, he walked off the line with a loaded rifle and nobody cleared him. So when I look back at it, that was the coach's fault. You know what I'm saying. But he ended up getting kicked out of our platoon for that and so now I'm in boot camp by myself, finishing up boot camp for the last month and a half. I graduate proud.
Speaker 1:Staff Sergeant Shell. Staff Sergeant Lauer. Staff Sergeant McNeil. Those are my drill instructors. Senior drill instructor McNeil Staff Sergeant McNeil. Staff Sergeant Lauer. Staff Sergeant Shell. It's crazy, crazy. I ended up running into them in Iraq in 2005. So now, boom, we get to the graduation. Who's there? Mom and dad.
Speaker 1:Now, me and my dad didn't have a great relationship my senior year because we had to throw hands. And the reason we had to throw hands is because as a child and as a child, there was a lot of domestic abuse from my mom and my dad against each other. So I was at a boiling point High school. You know, of course, you know you're feeling yourself, but at the same time I was just tired of him, like you know, hitting my mom and doing whatever he wanted to do, and we fought, we fought. I ended up getting my car taken away because he had got me my car. My senior year, got my letterman check taken away because he bought that too and we ain't taught he ain't come to my graduation. So, uh, me being a bigger person in boot camp, you know, I wrote him, I wrote my dad just to let him know, like, like, hey, you know what I mean, your baby boy doing his thing, and I know we had our differences but I'm trying to push past that. So me and my dad became best friends since since graduation Cause he, he, wrote back and my mom, mind you, my mom is this Marine mom Now.
Speaker 1:She got all the stickers, she got all the everything. If you seen her car, she used to drive a Grand Prix, a gold Grand Prix, and she had Marine Mom on every something. Marine, this my son's a United States Marine, marine, marine, Marine, marine, marine, marine. And I'm looking like yo, you wasn't like that before I left. You know what I mean. So you know.
Speaker 1:Now it's back to. I'm back home. Um, my mom uh, had moved my grandfather in when, uh, when, I was gone. So, like my bed, ain't even my bed no more, so I can't even sleep in my own bed. Um, my brother room ain't even. I don't even sleep in my own bed, my brother room, I don't even think the bed was in. No, it wasn't in there because he took his bed when he moved downtown. So I'm at home, I'm enjoying life, I'm just happy man. I'm seeing my cousins, me, book, ro Quez, k-ken, we all you know the boys like, we all like hanging out. I think we went to like a business gang. I'm just happy to be home.
Speaker 1:Then, you know, you go to MCT, which is Marine Combat Training, for 30 days after that in North Carolina. Then my MOS was 3531, motor Transport Operator. So I went to Fort Lost in the woods, fort Leonard Wood, missouri, right after I graduated MCT and from there I got stationed in California with my best friend, kadeem. Mind you, me and Kadeem met at boot camp. He was in lead series, I was in follow series and we've been tight since then. So we get to California, but then that's when we split. He goes to 33 area, camp Margarita, I go to 21 area, camp Del Mar. Camp Del Mar is the beach Once you come through the front gate.
Speaker 1:So I'm loving it. I'm at third tracks. Third tracks yeah, yes, I'm through the front gate. So I'm loving it. I'm at third tracks. Third tracks, yeah, yes, I'm enjoying life. I'm on my own. I'm 18. I got a T-top Cutlass on 20s.
Speaker 1:It's 2004. I'm loving life. I'm living life. I'm learning how to be an adult. I mean, we cleaning every Thursday. Field day was always Thursdays, but I'm learning how to be an adult. I mean, we clean it every Thursday. Field day was always Thursdays, but I'm doing my thing, I'm having fun. 2005 come Well, october 2004,.
Speaker 1:We got the call that, hey, first truck company is getting ready to go to Iraq and they need a few more Marines from different motor T units. So I'm like, bet I'll go, me and Joseph, corporal Joseph, shout out to Joseph, if you still alive, man, I don't know, I know you from Bakersfield, california. I'm pretty sure you are, and I know you're Bakersfield California, I'm pretty sure you are. And I know you're a cop. Now too. Shout out to you, Me and Corporal Joseph, go and we attach to truck company. Guess who at truck company, the dean, best friend, my brother. We back at it again. So we at it, man, we training, we getting ready to go to Iraq. Boom, now I know I'm super, I'm good, but mind you, the few.
Speaker 1:That helped me go to the Marine Corps was September 11th 2001. I was in my global issues class, which is like social, it's a social studies class for 11th graders, and I thought my teacher, ms Diabru, was watching a movie and I walked in. I'm like Ms Diabru, what's Ms D that's how I used to call her, ms D what movie is this? She's like, baby, this ain't no movie. I said what you mean. She's like. This is going on right now in New York Like somebody hijacked a plane and ran it between towers.
Speaker 1:So, being that my grandparents were veterans, I got a bunch of family members, cousins, uncles, that was in any other service, the branches of the service, and I think I was the first Marine, if I'm not mistaken, but all the other ones they were in, and I took that to heart, even though I still wanted to go to Norfolk State, even though I still wanted to, you know, pursue baseball, because baseball is my heart. I love football too, but when my grandma passed my grandma on my dad's side, I just lost the love for it. It used to like make me feel so much great and good inside that she would come to a game and she would root me on, because we all played Police Athletic League in Detroit Eastside Raiders when we were growing up and I played for Osborne JV. Then after that I just stopped, but baseball stayed with me. I stayed with baseball. I was on the swim team, all of that. So, yeah, that drove me to become a Marine as well. That was always on the back of my mind because I didn't like how that happened.
Speaker 1:So then we get to Iraq. Get to Iraq man flying there amazing. To Iraq. Get to Iraq man Flying there Amazing. Let me tell you we was on like a 777, 777, 1 to 747. It was a 777. This joint got two floors. It got four seats on the right, I think it was like eight in the middle, four on the left, bunch of TVs, we could watch movies and stuff. Like it was crazy. So you know, we stopped in Ireland. You know I'm like wow, like this is crazy.
Speaker 1:We get to Kuwait and we had to fly C-130s to Iraq. We in Iraq, we in the plane to C-130s to Iraq, we in Iraq, we in the plane, the C-130, and we doing combat roles. And I'm like why we? Why we, upside down and coming back around, they're like they shooting at us and I'm like who shooting at us? You know it still ain't hitting me.
Speaker 1:We land safely and we go to our unit. We hop in the trucks, we rip to our location, which was Ramadi. We get to Ramadi, we're with the truck company we was with Was thatadi. We were with the truck company we was with. Was that 1-5? We was with 5th Marines. Yeah, we was with 5th Marines, 1-5, I believe. Correct me if I'm wrong, but for sure it was 1-5. That's who we was with, 5th Marines, because the second time I deployed was 1st Marines. So yeah, we were 5th Marines, man the grunts.
Speaker 1:So you know, we in the thick of things, we get there, we just hearing like a bunch of explosions and I'm not understanding where it's coming from. Come to find out it was a burn. Looked like a dirt hill and Army artillery was on the other side shooting into the city because they were dropping mortars in our camp. And next thing, you know, I see a big old mushroom cloud. Like what is that? I felt the ground trembling and I just hear a loud explosion, boom. I'm like oh, they got me. No, they didn't get me, but it was a IED Blew up, maybe, maybe, I would say 500 meters outside our camp gates, and it's still, mind you. No, it was about a couple miles away and it shook the ground. And then everybody looked at each other and it shook the ground. And then everybody looked at each other and one of the Marines that we were replacing. He was like welcome to Iraq. I'm like, oh ooh. So yeah, we in it, we in the thick of it, we in the thick of it. When I tell you Ramadi me, coming from Detroit, I thought I seen it all. Ramadi was crazy.
Speaker 1:I can't count on my hands, my toes, Kadeem's hands and toes and a bunch of other Marines' hands and toes on how many Marines we lost in total. I've seen COs commanding officers get blown up. I've seen fellow Marines, lance Corporals that were, you know, infantrymen. We had a basketball court. I was on Hurricane Point. Kadeem, I believe, was with Bravo. I was with Alpha Company, kadeem was with Bravo, and we had some people from Charlie and that was Charlie Company, I think. Co and Company First Sergeant got blown up, coming out their gate and we stayed across the street from Hurricane Point, I mean from Snake Pit. That was the name of Charlie. Charlie was at Snake Pit. We was at Hurricane Point. Bravo was still on base on Camp Ramadi.
Speaker 1:Then we had combat outposts all throughout the city. But the thing that I loved about it not love, but it made us feel like home because all the streets on the map was named after college teams or states. So of course, you had Wolverine, you had Michigan. Michigan was the main street that came straight into Hurricane Point and that Snake Pit was on the side of too. But you had Buckeye, you had Badger, you had Hawkeye. All these streets was named after Big Ten schools, sec schools, and it made us feel comfortable with learning the areas. But what I'm saying is, every day we were in combat, when I was with alpha company, um, I can recall an ambush.
Speaker 1:It was a simple hey, we're gonna go down michigan, we're gonna go to the soup. The soup was like the marketplace that all the arabic people, the Iraqis, lived and they sold fruit, vegetables, goats, chickens, anything you could think of. It was like, for instance, like I live, I'm out here in Maryland, but I'm right by DC, like Eastern Market or you know what I mean. It was like that. So it was hey, we're going to drive in, we're going to offload the Marines. Kennedy, which is me, I believe Ross, was with us.
Speaker 1:We had four seven-tons, four seven-tons, and the goal was we drive in, we come up, we do a U-turn on Michigan, and it was like two Hummers in front of us and two Hummers behind us, but it was four, seven tons. So they were like, hey, we're going to pull into the suit and we're going to back out. Now, mind you, the seven tons couldn't fit in the suit and the streets because they were so tight and they had, like, I guess, like, like I don't know what it was, like rugs or something Like, yeah, like these sheets hanging over and wires were so low. We started to put like these, these poles, these PVC pipes on our seven tons so it won't get connected to our trucks, right, and we will let the wires go over and so it won't like get stuck on our, our trucks. And then now we didn't knock out their power and now we got to pay for that. You know what I mean. So the first two trucks pulled in, um, which was me and I want to say it was from Motor T we pulled in, and the other two trucks, seven tons, pulled in. So now it's four or seven tons in the tight like marketplace street and they were like yo, all right, the first two go ahead and back out. So the first seven ton, the fourth seven ton, in the rear, backed out back onto Michigan. They already had rear security from that angle from that way, because it was two Hummers back there with Mark 19s and two 40s on them. So, matter of fact, it was Ross and me. So we backed out. We were the third and fourth 7-ton. We backed out and the other two 7-tons, were still in the street, like in the road, but they were inside, they were covered. So we back out.
Speaker 1:All I hear is like it sound like I don't know if you remember like them poppers from fireworks where you throw it on the ground, the little white things, and be like pap, pap, pap, pap, pap. That's what it was sounding like and I'm like yo, what the hell? Now all I hear on the on the comms is yo, we, yo, yo, we get ambushed, we get ambushed and we like yo, where, where? I don't see where. And all I hear is so I see hall shout out to corporal hall. He was uh, a gunner and a hummer and he was right in front of me when we backed out. So he, he's uh shooting. I see him shooting different areas that we get ambushed from all over.
Speaker 1:We in the build it's buildings. They are all the insurgents in the buildings. So I see one. You know, I grabbed my, my uh m16, and started aiming. I had loaded my rifle with a bunch of tracers so I could show them. Hey, I got guys right here. So I told Corporal Hart like Corporal Hart, turn your turret this way, follow my tracers. So next thing you know I'm shooting at the sergeant. He's shooting a Mark 19. Blowing the whole like holes into the building.
Speaker 1:Right, while all of this is going on, I had a gunner too in my car, in my truck, and I look back I see I see this surgeon like trying to creep up and like pretty much, if we would have let him he would have crept up to the truck, open the door and shot both of us. But I'm like yo, yo, yo. I'm hitting his leg, like yo, behind us, behind us, right here, and I'm. He turns around. He turns the turret around. He gets to shoot his saw. He had a saw and it jams. He like yo, he grabbed his pistol, it fallsams. He's like yo, he grabbed his pistol, it falls. And now, mind you, he's standing on it. He's on it like a stand. I'm in my truck, he's in this stand right here. His feet is right here. I see the 9mm drop down. I grab the 9mm, throw it back up to him. He puts about five to seven rounds into the guy. He's down, we're all going through it.
Speaker 1:And while we still in the midst of it, you know what I mean we still understanding the comms. So they're like, hey, push back, push those two trucks back to the government center. So we pushed back to the government center. The other two guys got out. That's just one story. Nobody got hurt that time.
Speaker 1:But every day it was chaos. Marines work well in chaos. When it's quiet, something's about to happen. When it's quiet, something's about to happen. So when you got kids, it's the same thing. When it's quiet, them kids doing something. Hey, what y'all doing over there? You know what I'm saying. That's how it is with us. Like it was quiet, it was super quiet. And what I remember, when I got back to the government center I was so hyped I'm like, yeah, we got them, not knowing Days later we lose some more Marines and it became a constant thing Seeing Marines and insurgents, brains over the car seat, backseat from them, trying to run their car into our building, which one car drove into our uh, combat outpost set off a vehicle born IED, which is a improvised explosive device.
Speaker 1:So it was a vehicle-borne improvised explosive device, the tanker too. So me, to this day I still have anxiety when I drive next to tank fuel trucks because that's what it was, it was a tanker. To this day, I'm saying all of that to say this I had a lot of trauma that first deployment and I didn't know it until I came back. I was very angry, I was very anxious, but the whole time there I was just happy that I still had the dean with me and the rest of the homies from truck company with us, but one of them had to go back because he did get hit with an IED.
Speaker 1:And one instance with me I was riding with a sergeant and our goal is, when we drive and always stay on the concrete roads, if you go on a dirt road, stay behind the same tracks as the vehicle in front of you. And I remember my sergeant telling me to swerve, follow that vehicle in front of you. I'm like yo, sergeant, you sure Like we on a dirt road because we had to go through a back way. We were doing a mission. And he was like, yeah, just follow him, just follow him and follow him. And I literally swerved left, swerved right, but I didn't swerve all the way right like the vehicle in front of me did, and I just swerved just a little bit and literally just corrected myself and followed the vehicle in front of me. And once I followed the vehicle in front of me, I hear a loud explosion, boom, my ear ringing, and I'm I like just froze and stopped, like the vehicle just rolling, I'm thinking I got hit. Everybody's on the comm like yo, I'm hit, I'm hit, I'm hit, and I'm like I'm hit, I'm hit, and I'm like Sergeant ain't hit Our gunner, he saying he got hit, but the vehicle behind us got hit because he went too far left, I mean too far right.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, mind you, this whole time I am checking back home, you know, checking on family, this one, we had calling cards. We didn't have the satellite phones or nothing like that. So my dad was the power attorney of my car, my mom was the power attorney of my uh, finances, everything, and me not knowing, because we navy fed was just starting, online banking usa was just starting, like online banking was just starting. In 2005, I gave my mom my whole, my whole wallet and the reason why I made her my power of attorney is because, for one, my mom, both of my parents, got degrees in business, but my mom had just got her master's degree, an MBA, in business administration. So I'm like, all right, cool administration. So I'm like all right, cool, to keep them from arguing or bickering about whatever, I'm going to give both of y'all some kind of special attorney, right? So I gave my dad a special power of attorney, I gave my mom a power of attorney general, everything pretty much. So I'm like, hey, ma, like how I'm doing, like you know how the money looking? She's like don't worry about none of that. Like Just focus on yourself and focus on getting back here. So I'm like all right, cool, how's everything? You know what I mean. You need anything. She's like no, I'm straight, cool Pops, how'd I whip, whip, good, you're good, you're going to be straight storage, not knowing. I could have just put it into the Marine Corps storage and I wouldn't have had to pay, but my pops was paying every month on my car storage for seven months. Um, now, mind you, we had dispersion over there. So anything that I need to grab cash or something I can grab from dispersion. And when we was over there, we was getting paid pretty good, especially for TFCs and Lance Corp. We was getting paid good and if you was married. You was really getting paid, but I wasn't. So you know, deployment ended.
Speaker 1:You know I'm ready to come back home. I'm hyped. You know they do parades when you come back home. So you know they got the motorcycles like a bunch of Harleys, guiding us back on the buses when we flew back in. We stopped at Germany first, then on our way back to the States. You know, we get to Cali and boom, the Harleys driving us the whole way in on the buses or whatever we hype. You know I'm hype.
Speaker 1:I'm like yo, me and Kadeem. I'm thinking like yo. I already know what I'm about to do to the whip. I'm about to throw some doughs on it. I'm about to throw foes on it. You know what I'm saying. But I get to the parade. You know I'm trying to look for my family. All I see is my dad and my sister. I'm like Pops, where my mom at. She's like man, I don't know. She's been tripping lately. I'm like that's strange. But anyway, hey, let's have fun. I'm back. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:My little sister, I think she was like Kaylin, was like if I was 19,. Kaylin was 14. So she was in high school. So I wanted to, you know, take her to the mall, get her some clothes. You know what I'm saying. Get her nice. You know what I mean. Get her set up.
Speaker 1:I wanted to pull out like a thousand. So I went to Navy Federal and I said yo, let me get a thousand out. The teller looked at me Like boy please. I said look. I said look, I just got back from Iraq, man, you know I'm talking about Detroit. Look, you know popping my. You know what. Like yo, let me get a thousand out. Stop playing here. Here go my access number. I don't got my ID. I don't got my cards. Like my mom got my cards. I don't got nothing. Can I get a new car? She's like yeah, we can get you a new car.
Speaker 1:But she was like sir you? She's like are you Antoine Kennedy? I said yes. She's like do you stay at 14063 Collingham, detroit, michigan, 48205? I said yes. She said that is your home of residence, right? I said home of rec. I said yes. She said, sir, you have $100 and something dollars in this account, $200 and something dollars in this account, a total of $424 something dollars. I'm like yo, you tripping. I know I got some racks up in there, man, what are you talking about? Mind you, my dad and my sister in the car, so they don't even know what's going on. So she was like hold on, sir, she's just scrolling, scrolling, scrolling, scrolling, scrolling, scrolling, scrolling. She said, sir, I do see a lot of withdrawals, like were you withdrawn? I said, ma'am, I don't have my car, how am I going to withdraw anything? She said well, no, the withdrawals are in Detroit. I see a lot of withdrawals from your account every day, multiple times a day, and that's when it hit me. So I go back to the car, so I go back to the car.
Speaker 1:Everything I can think of from those seven months of deployment, getting shot at, vehicle blowing up, and not to mention I tipped over a truck from sleep, deprivation of driving for over 24 hours straight. I'm thinking about all these things, I'm crying in the car. My dad like yo, twan, what's up? Like, what's going on? And I'm like yo, she spent my fucking money. And he was like what? Like yo, what? I'm cussing man, yo little sister in the back.
Speaker 1:I said no, fuck that, start calling, calling her. I said yo, you spend my fucking money. She said watch who you talking to. I'm your mama. I said I don't give a fuck who you are. I'm about to treat you like a nigga on the street cause you just treated me like a nigga on the street. I don't like you spend my money like I've been through a lot of shit, like I don't have nothing.
Speaker 1:I have nothing in my account and that $400 that I had to take out, that was to get my car out the storage cause my dad didn't pay the final month's rent, so that $400 was gone. So now I'm down to zero dollars and I had nothing. Zero. I'm going off on my mom Crying, going off on my mom Crying, going off on her. Everything I got Gone. I just got a cutlass T-top cutlass. No gas, no clothes, no shoes, no food. Good thing that when you are in the military you get free food if you're not married with your meal card. So chow hall always. You can always eat.
Speaker 1:But the whole time in my mind I'm like yo, how could she do this? How could she do this? So I called my grandma because if she spent my money I was like I put two and two together. I said she was like I do see a lot of transactions. The lady the teller. She said I do see a lot of transactions and there some of them are at the casino, mgm Casino. So I called my grandma. I said Grandma. I said you know my mom, spend my money. She go what. I said, yeah, y' spent my money. She goes what. I said, yeah, y'all was going to the casino a lot. She said yeah. I said yeah, she was using my money for y'all to go to the casino. And I said, grandma, how you let your daughter do this to your grandson? She said, baby, that ain't got nothing to do between me and you, that's between you and her. When my grandma said that, I piped down Trying to pop off on my grandma. But she was right, it had nothing to do with my grandma, me and my mom.
Speaker 1:So now when you come home from the Marine Corps, you get at least 30 days of R&R, meaning just pretty much free vacation to go anywhere and decompress from what you dealt with. Um, and they also had me signed up for um, ptsd classes, trauma classes, different classes. They had the Marine Corps, all the branches, I believe do, I know for sure Marine Corps does it. So I had all these classes signed up for me when I got back off my 30-day vacation but my 30-day vacation. Guess where I'm at? I'm back home at my mama's house with no place to sleep, because my grandfather lives in my room. Now there's no bed in my brother's room and I just got a couch with no money.
Speaker 1:So now I'm back home with my homies. They're like yo, how was Iraq? How was this? You shoot anybody? You know the typical civilian homie questions. You kill somebody, you know, and all of this. They're asking me this. I'm still traumatized, like I'm still going through it.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, I'm there, no money, I go back home for those 30 days. I remember going to my Uncle Keef house it's a picture and I wasn't happy. And I know, auntie Paula, I know you didn't mean no harm by it, but everybody knew. Because my dad told my side of the family what happened. My brother was crushed. He stopped talking to her for a while. The messed up part is it's like I had to drive her car the whole 30 days. I was home and I used to have to pick her up from work and take her to work, because she gave me her car to do whatever I needed to do, but what I was going to do with no money. So, uh, I leave, fly back to Cali.
Speaker 1:I go to the classes. Um, one of the classes I walked out of because it was like one of those classes where they be like. I want you to look out the window and see whatever the first thing you see. I want you to visualize that. Close your eyes and visualize that and take it to a safe space with you and da-da-da-da-da, guess what's outside the window at this class? A big blue trash can. But now I'm heated, I walk out of the class. I want to kill everything. I want to kill everything.
Speaker 1:I struggled with PTSD for a long time. Then I met Benita. We was in the Marines together. Basketball was my outlet on base. Of course we played other sports, but I knew for sure at lunch I can play ball after work, 5 o'clock, we gonna get some bump. Any area, it didn't matter I was at 21 area, we gonna get some bump. Main side, any area, las Pogas, any area I knew I can go to and get bumped.
Speaker 1:So I stayed in Del Mar and I played ball, me and Benita hanging out, we cooling, we chilling. We became friends and she could play ball. She played for the Marine Corps women's basketball team, the team for the women. She was she, can she? She was nice, she can shoot, but I used to like hook her to the hole. I was always a. I was a point guard. I didn't really have a jump shot, but I'd take it to the hole every day. Easy on you and I was fast. But yeah, we hanging out, 2005 ends Still ain't got no money.
Speaker 1:I'm just basically living paycheck to paycheck. First and 15th in the military. Seven months later after I left, I left home I get a letter from my mom with a $4,000 check on it in it. With a letter, the $4,000 I pretty much paid off my car with my old school was only like it was like $4,600, and I already had paid some of it down every time I got paid, my first and 15th. I read the letter and the letter she pretty much said there was no apology. It was just like hey, how you doing? Da-da-da, da, da. And here's a I hope you see the check that I put in here for $4,000 or whatever, but the reason why I spent your money, because I didn't think he was going to make it back.
Speaker 1:Anger Boiling, I want to kill everything. I want to kill everything. I couldn't believe she said that my own flesh and blood, wrote me off. Hmm, I called my dad, told him what she said, called my brother, told him what she said. Everybody crushed.
Speaker 1:Since that day, may 2006, I stopped speaking to my mom, wrote her off, said hey, she wrote me off, she thought I was gonna be dead. But the thing is is she spent $13,000 for my money, probably like 10, cause I spent 3 for sure over there, but I made like 15. It was something like I know I made 15 over there, tax free, but she spent all that money. And my thing is, if she would've spent the money on, like, fixing up the house over there tax-free, but she spent all that money. And my thing is, if she would have spent the money on fixing up the house, doing something around the house to where I know I got somewhere to come back to, or put my name on the house, to where I can have the house when anything happened, I'd have been fine. I'd have been upset, but the wound would have been a little bit less than what she said, because that's something that I couldn't give back. I was always told to keep negative people out your life, no matter who they are. So that's what I did, because that was a negative virus that I felt like would have put me in a different position I am now. I wouldn't be here today because I know I'd be locked up for what I would have done.
Speaker 1:2015 came, mind you, I'm I'm 11 years in the Marine Corps. I didn't do recruiting duty, I didn't have the time. I got back to. I got stationed back to first TSB. I'm thinking I'm going to shoe in to get promoted. I get to TSB. I'm thinking I'm going to shoe in and get promoted. I get to TSB. They didn't even know I was supposed to be there and they was like man, that's another sergeant, I think it was like 10 sergeants there and I was the senior sergeant. Only sergeant had been deployed twice. I had. I had I had status, but I didn't care about that because I always cared about the Marines and the well-being of the Marines, um, but I thought I was a shoo-in getting promoted Before I left recruiting duty.
Speaker 1:Um, our Sergeant Major got relieved. He cared so much about the Marines, so much man, and he made sure that we was prepared to go back to the fleet. Because recruiting duty is like the Wild Wild West you do different things. The orders ain't really orders out there. You know what I mean. So Sergeant Major Parton got relieved. To this day I still don't know why they did that One of the best sergeant majors I ever met in my life. But this mass sergeant had, like a I never seen someone in the same uniform as you hate another Marine like I seen. And when Sergeant Major got relieved, everybody's like photos and everything. It didn't matter, like they didn't care. All he cared about was recruiting because he was the RI for the station. He was the RI for the station. I pretty much do my last farewell before I leave.
Speaker 1:He got mad at me because I didn't thank him. I'm like man, why am I going to thank you? You put me through hell for these three years. You know what I'm saying On recruiting duty in Jersey. I'm not thanking nobody. That put me through hell. I just can't do it. I get to TSB.
Speaker 1:Nobody knew I was coming. You know the board was convening and I'm asking questions like hey, anybody know anything? The company Gunny didn't know nothing. The staff sergeant, other staff sergeant didn't know nothing. I'm just lost in the sauce with it and I'm asking all these people. And I didn't get selected Because I was in a below zone. So it was time for me to reenlist In 2015,. I put in my reenlistment package. My reenlistment package got denied. I'm like what's going on? They're like, well, you got a P. I'm like how I get a P? I was in a below zone. They was like, oh, the zone shifted during the board and I was like, how, like, where's the Mark Adman, where's anything that says that it shifted? I don't know nothing about it and how did I still get a P?
Speaker 1:I had a successful tour on recruiting duty and I was a sergeant for eight years and they had the stipulation that by the 10-year mark you had to be gone. If you didn't pick up staff sergeant, you got to be gone. I was already at 11 years because I had extended to do recruiting and staff sergeant, you got to be gone. I was already at 11 years because I had extended to do recruiting. And, yeah, it crushed me. So now I'm back to that dark place, that dark hole. I just want to kill everything. My mom reached out then. I just spoke to her, that was it. But I didn't speak to her like on a daily basis or nothing like that. It was just she was just checking on me. Everybody was calling in, you know, shout out to Coco, shout out to Lampson, shout out to Tina Turnip, because they were the ones there, my Marine sisters. That was like with me the whole step of the way, like I didn't even go back to work. I was crushed.
Speaker 1:My whole life was the Marine Corps. I didn't have a plan B. I didn't have a plan C. I'm married. I got two kids. Now you know what I mean. Tootie was just born in December 2014. So now I got to figure out how to be a husband and go back. So yeah, 2015 happened. I got forced out the Marine Corps. They gave me $40,000 set, not knowing that I couldn't get my disability until that $40,000 ran out. I would have known that I probably would have never took it, but they gave me 80% disability out the gate, which I should have been 100, I felt I mean all the shit I've been through.
Speaker 1:I drive down to Dallas to surprise Quez. He was graduating, the first boy on the boy side of the family to graduate college. So I popped up on him 2015. Him and his wife, brittany, and Moot, his mom, dinka, kathy, my brother everybody showed up, popped up on him. Dennis, tamika, tanisha everybody popped up on him, right?
Speaker 1:So we having a time, dinka and Moot put me to the side and was like, hey, you still don't talk to your mom. Mind you, my whole family, on both sides, the Kennedy and Jordans, know each other very well. They grew up together. They lived across the street from each other, on Maxwell 57, 55. Maxwell across the street was my mom and them. That's how my dad met my mom, right? Everybody knows each other.
Speaker 1:So Dinka and Moot was like hey, you still don't talk to your mom. I said nah, what I have no reason to. To me she's dead. To me, she wrote me off. I can't get, I can't, I can't. If you mess up on certain things, okay, cool, you apologize, keep it moving, but you write me off and still don't apologize. I can't, I can't do that, I just can't. I can't even look your way. And that's how I used to be. I'd go in my grandma's house. She'd be there. I'd walk right past her. They asked me. They said can you at least try for us and the love that I have? Again, I told you I'm off. Love my family, I love all my family, right? So they're my big cousins. So if they asking me, all right, cool, I'll give it a try. So I came home in 2015.
Speaker 1:Me and my mom went out to eat at Famous Dave Never forget Famous Dave. We having a good time talking. I let it all go because it was my big cousin asking me to do something. So I'm not going to play with it. You know what I'm saying. I'm not going to play around and just act like I'm faking it.
Speaker 1:I'm actually having a conversation with her. I'm looking at her. I'm talking to her. We talking about whatever, asking about the girls, all of that. I'm FaceTiming the girls while she you know what I mean she's talking to them, all of that.
Speaker 1:Then she was like let's go to the MGM. We go to the MGM, I'm walking around, she finds her slots that she wants. Boom, we're sittingGM. I'm walking around, she find her slots that she want and boom, we sitting there. I'm trying to play the slots. I'm not winning nothing. I'm next to her and you know, I'm just watching her. Now and boom, I'm having an episode, because now I'm reliving everything. This is how you was spending my money, because now I'm reliving everything. This is how you were spending my money. You were just hitting that button over and over and over and over again and I'm having an episode, but I'm keeping it together and she wins the money. It was like a hundred and something dollars. She give it to me and I cash it and we go about our day, we having a mother-son relationship again.
Speaker 1:I'm back in DC now. I'm being a house husband because I don't work, I'm out the Marine Corps, I'm just doing what I can. Benita was sick. I had to make sure that she was medically covered before anything. I had to make sure that she was medically covered before anything. And I'm trying to get back into that life because, mind you, me and Benita wasn't even living together for those three and a half four years while I was on recruiting duty. We had two kids with that. So you know what I mean. I'm trying to just we trying to learn each other again. But I'm still being a house husband and taking care of the kids, taking them to school, taking them to daycare, cooking, all of that, doing whatever I need to do.
Speaker 1:Right, she retires. She sent me some money. She sent my brother some money. Apparently, she sent me more money than she sent my brother and I you know, me and my brother talk. So I'm like, when she sent me this, she was like man, she only sent me that. I'm like I don't know what's up with that. And she was like hey, this is some of the money from my retirement. I'm trying to keep something. I'm trying to keep them from looking into my accounts and seeing if I got a lot of money. I'm like what are you trying to do, though? Why you just don't keep it in your account? And she's like no, this is for y'all here. Take this. If you need to spend it, do whatever. Just try to put money back in when you can. I'm like all right, cool.
Speaker 1:So this is the time my mom started going on cruises and vacations. So every time she asking for 400, 500, 600, send this, send this, send this, send this. So I'm sending it money ground, you know, apple Pay, and none of that stuff ain't even out for real yet. So I'm just sending it, sending it, going to the West Lane, sending it, sending it. And I'm like it got to the point where the money ran out. So she texted me and said where's the rest of my fucking money at? I'm like huh. And she was like you better have my fucking money back in there by October or I'm going to sue you. I said I'm reading a text message. I said I know you fucking lying. I said is this the same? I said is this sure this the same woman that that took all my money, spent it at a casino with my grandma and then wrote me seven months later and told me the reason why she spent the money cause she didn't think I was gonna make it out of our rat. You texted me this and still ain't apologized. I said yo look, I got you one. I got you. Do me a solid. I said don't you ever fucking call my phone, text my phone ever again in my life? And that was the last time I heard from him. So that's been like 10 plus years. It's 2025 now.
Speaker 1:I'm big on my peace. I can't let nothing get in between my peace. I can't let nothing get in between my peace. 2019, I got divorced. It ain't what I wanted to do.
Speaker 1:Benita said it wasn't nothing she wanted to do. But I knew why she was divorcing me Because you know, in VA, after 10 years, um, if y'all still married, your spouse rates half of your pension and I ain't want her money. But um, at the time we were going back and forth. We went on the greatest terms because I had left, we separated, I left and moved out. But that day was weird because after we got divorced we went to lunch and she was like you know, I ain't want to do this, but I couldn't be married to you in July by July, and it had been 10 years. And I respect that. You know what I mean. My only thing is like I never wanted to be that person to say I made you go everywhere with me in the military and you didn't have a career, so I made you know I wanted to make sure that she had a career and didn't have a career, so I made you know I wanted to make sure that she had a career. And she do have a career. She still got a career. Now I'm just trying to help her. You know, get her not her GI, get her disability stuff. But we're good, we co-parenting now that's what it is.
Speaker 1:But my peace is everything. My kids is everything. I'm not letting nobody get in my way of my peace at all. I can't. I just can't. I have my own place. I'm here, I'm chilling. I've lost friends. I've gained friends, but those friends that I've lost, like I can't let you back in. I just can't. I can't. If my own flesh and blood do me how she done me, I can only imagine what you would do. So when you lose that friendship with me, it's severed, you can't get it back. So, when it comes to my peace, I'm not allowing a family member, I'm not allowing a friend of the family. I'm not allowing a family member. I'm not allowing a friend of the family. I'm not allowing my own siblings. I'm not allowing anybody getting in the way of my peace. Now I joined the church. I got baptized last year October 22nd yeah, october 22nd. Yeah, october 22nd.
Speaker 1:I needed to find a relationship. I needed to find my relationship with God because I was, I was spiraling. I was spiraling and I knew I was going. It wasn't going to be a crash out Like, but I was going do some things to some people that played with my piece. I knew that wasn't the case and I knew that wasn't the route. I was trying to go. And also, I just needed it. Man, I just felt like everything was coming down on me.
Speaker 1:This entrepreneur stuff is very tough. Trying to make it out on your own and everybody thinking you doing so great, and you got it and you, you balling, and this, this and this, and nine times out of ten man, it's a struggle. It's a struggle every time. As an entrepreneur, I quit my government job to pursue my career doing music. I found another love it's potting, podcasting, talking and it helps me Therapeutically To get my feelings out and I feel like when I do this, I'm already, I'm already good, I'm happy, I'm straight and I still got my therapist. I go talk to my therapist every Tuesday. My therapist definitely helped me get through a lot of this. But yeah, god man, I had to talk to Big G one time and let him know like, hey, I need you, I need you.
Speaker 1:But now apparently, my mom hasn't been taking care of herself quite some time and I don't know how she I don't know she ended up here in December. That's all I know. I know she was here since December. That's all I know. I know she was here since December. And I had an aunt call me and tell me that hey, your mama had a heart attack and she's in DC. I said, okay, she's like oh, I was just telling you because you know you're her son. I'm like, okay, she's like oh, I was just telling you because you know you're her son. I'm like okay, what you want me to do. She's like well, you know that's your mom. I was just letting you know. I don't know the situation between you and your mom, but I was just letting you know. Now, this is 2025.
Speaker 1:I don't think I got boo-boo on my forehead, but the fact that my aunt even said that I felt like she was enabling a situation that I've been. I forgave my mom. I'm not even waiting on an apology, no more. I just forgave her and I kept it moving. That don't mean I got to be around you. You know what I mean and that's what I did. I forgave her. I've been forgave her. But you know what I'm saying. I just felt like my aunt saying that it was uncalled for for one. Two, I felt like she was enabling an old situation, gaslighting it right, trying to throw the fuel on it to start something up, and I think she was looking for a reaction.
Speaker 1:But again, my piece is everything. You're not about to get a reaction out of me. So I'm asking you what do you want me to do? And I asked her questions. I'm like where's she at? I don't know. They said she's about to medevac her. I said where's she going, where's she at? I don't know. I'm just letting you know. Okay, cool, boom, benita called. I called Benita. I said hey, you know my mom here. She said, hey, you know my mom here. She said, yeah, she been here since December. I said, oh, okay, which? She had a relationship. I never stopped her having a relationship with my mom for the kids and everything. I'm not petty like that, but yeah.
Speaker 1:So she said she was supposed to come see the girls but she was feeling sick, so she went to the hospital. She said she was going to come see the girls but she was feeling sick, so she went to the hospital. She said she was going to get checked out because she wasn't feeling well. So I'm like, oh, okay, I'm like, well, my aunt just said she just had a heart attack. She said what she said she ain't had no heart attack, maybe pneumonia she might have pneumonia, but she ain't had no heart attack. So I'm like, hmm, all right, I go, I go, I go one my next day, matter of fact, that same day, I'm heading home. I could have just went home, but it was something on my heart. My God was telling me to hey, hey, just go check, see what's going on. I did that. I went.
Speaker 1:I ended up being a little bit too early. I told Benita, hey, I'm here. She's like all right, I don't need to come. I just you know what I mean, I just I'm about to go to sleep. So I said you know what I mean, I just I'm about to go to sleep. So I said cool, it's like eight, nine o'clock, she, she, she.
Speaker 1:I'm waiting on her to get there medevac from a helicopter. I'm asking the hospital hey, is Sharon there? And they're like no, she's not here yet. She's like wait 30 minutes. It shouldn't take no more than 30 minutes Because, mind you, it's only like three hospitals in DC and like two close by in the Maryland area PG County, bowie I mean not Bowie, but Largo, and I think Doctors is the only close one that can get there. She said they'll get here within 25 minutes. Who Go back up 30 minutes? Nope, she's still not here. What's the patient name? Told her the patient name. Wait an hour, go back up. I said look man. I said look man, she's in 2NE room 9. She's in ICU.
Speaker 1:The lady at the desk said oh, oh, oh. She started moving around calling people da da, da, da da. She said okay, okay, okay, I finally got it. She's at 4NE here, go your badge, get your badge so I take a picture get a badge, go through this door, go all the way down and go up to 4NE. I get up to 4NE, I say yeah, I'm here to see Sharon.
Speaker 1:They like who like? Sharon Jordan? They're like we don't have nobody on this floor with that name. I'm like yo, y'all just sent me up here from emergency. What are you talking about? They looked at my name. I had a little sticker have my name 4NE, where I was supposed to go, all of that. So I'm like, yeah, she's not in the system, she's not up here. We don't have no patient up here for that name. So I said, okay, can you look in your computer and tell me where she's at? She's here somewhere in here, this big hospital. So they was like, yeah, you got to go back down to the emergency room to do that. I. So they was like, yeah, you got to go back down to the emergency room to do that. I said you know what? Okay, go back down to the emergency room. I'm waiting in line.
Speaker 1:The lady doing whatever, gossiping, talking to whoever in the back and there's two other people in front of me. Mind you, I've been there for three hours. I said you know what, I'm going to just go home. I went home, I'm going to just go home. I went home. Part of me wanted to cuss the lady out for playing with me. But I said you know what? That's bro? Because the old Antoine, when it went up there, the old Antoine would have said to hell with her. The old Antoine would have been like I would have probably hung up on my aunt, but I didn't. I still speak to two of my aunts on that side. So, yeah, I tell Benita what happened. Benita's still in communication. She's keeping me updated.
Speaker 1:So I call the next day because Benita's like hey, can you call Because something ain't sounding right. So I called the next day because Benita was like hey, can you call Because something ain't sounding right. So I call. They say she needs to be put on dialysis because she can't produce her own urine. So I said, ok, what's the procedures to that? They were like well, we normally go through the neck, we can go through the arm, we can go to the thigh, we can go different places to help to put the needle in for dialysis. So I said, okay, cool, what's the likelihood of it being long-term? What's the likelihood of it being short-term? Is she going to stay on it or what's going on? The doctor said it just all depends on her kidneys. And I was like, okay, cool, I'll call back tomorrow. Call back tomorrow.
Speaker 1:Almost every day I call checking the status Again, bro, but I'm not doing it for nobody else, I'm just doing it for me. It ain't for nobody else. I don't need the spectacle. You know what. I'm not doing it for nobody else, I'm just doing it for me. It ain't for nobody else. I don't need the spectacle. You know what I'm saying. So, mind you, she goes and tell everybody back home I'm coming up there to see her and she's bringing me a charger. You know nothing about no charger, didn't tell nobody. I was bringing her a charger, but Nita was supposed to bring her a charger. So I guess she put it in her head that I was going to get the charger for her. Nah, so again I've checked on her.
Speaker 1:Then I get another call from another aunt and she's talking to me very aggressive. She said are you all right? I said I'm fine, are you sure, yes, well, you know, you know that's your mom and this, this and this, and you know. You know if you a man, a guy, you supposed to, you know you should be carrying yourself a different way. Hold up, don't do that. So now I'm getting irritated, and it's one of my closest aunts too. I'm super irritated because it's like where is this coming from? You know my situation, you know where I stand and nothing's going to change, but in her eyes she just thought she had to lay.
Speaker 1:When it comes to death, man, people start acting very weird, very weird, start acting very weird, very weird. Prime example, when Quez passed away, people started acting very weird. But yeah, she was trying to. She's like you know, that's your mom and I care about her. You know she did a lot for me growing up, da-da-da-da-da. I said Auntie, that's okay, that's your relationship with her. My relationship ain't the same and you can't make me feel some way for you, like I'm my own person, I'm about to be 40 years old, I'm straight, I'm good, I don't need. I don't need this, this lecture or this, this. She was like well, you know, I'm just trying to. I said auntie, I'm good. She just kept going, kept going, kept going, finally get off the phone. Now I'm hot, I'm human, and she was calling me While I was playing the game With the homies, like you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 1:So I'm on call of duty. I can't even concentrate, can't communicate with the homies. They mad at me. I'm trying to communicate to them Saying it's dude in the pods, and then I got my aunt In my ear talking nonsense. Then I had to explain it to my boys and then I got my aunt in my ear talking nonsense and I had to explain it to my boys. Now one thing I will say D Paul, chris Pau, they know, they know what's up, man, we talk every day. They know what's up and I appreciate them for understanding it. But yeah, man, I wasn't looking forward to that because, again, I'm me.
Speaker 1:Y'all handle death differently. I don't. Only time I handle death a different way is when somebody wasn't supposed to leave this earth on some mishaps that happened in training to become a cop. My cousin Quiz, you know what I'm saying, and I literally was just talking to him. I just seen him because I visited him before I went to the boys trip in Houston. I was in Dallas. So with that I handled death differently.
Speaker 1:I've seen people die right in front of me. I've seen a Marine. Like I was saying earlier, he would watch us play basketball on Hurricane Point. He never played. He had these bifocals we call them BCs birth control glasses but this dude was a mean, he was an infantry, he was a gunner. You know what I'm saying? A machine gunner. The machine gunner. I seen half his body down the street because the IED blew up this big hole the size of my whole room. That's how big that hole was. Because I was QRF, I had to go out there and secure the area and look at that hole and the parts of the Hummer is not even there. They down the street in other people's yards. The top half of his body is down the street.
Speaker 1:So I handled death differently. Yeah, I handled death differently, and not saying that my mom is gonna die, but if she does like I handle it different that's between me and the man upstairs I handle it differently, poise. Um, I handle it differently, poise. I believe I have a lot of that. So I handle things way differently than everybody else.
Speaker 1:You can't make me feel the way you want me to feel. People Just want to let y'all know that how I handle things is how I handle things. How you handle things is how you handle things. I don't want no sympathy. I don't want no empathy. I don't want it If it's genuine, I know it's genuine, but I don't need the extra excessive comments or anything. It's genuine, but I don't need the extra excessive comments or anything. That's going on right now. I just don't, because I'm again. My peace is everything. I'm very calm. Please don't rattle the snake, don't rattle the bear. Please don't Don't do it, because you're not going to like the outcome. That switch hasn't been on in a long time and I don't want to turn it on. I'm a changed man, but don't get it twisted, but yeah, so I felt like this pod.
Speaker 1:I want to share a little bit more in depth of like what I've been dealing with in the last 20 years of my life, because it was 20 years ago this happened and I've went through multiple therapists. My therapist now is great. She understands, she's always looking out for me, she's helping me. I had to go through therapists because some of them were just putting a check in the box, but this, my therapist now, is great. She's sometimes all over the place when it comes to like scheduling and we miss each other sometimes because I ain't gonna lie, I fell asleep a couple times, sometimes all over the place. When it comes to scheduling, we miss each other sometimes because I ain't going to lie, I fell asleep a couple times during our session or I was supposed to have a session and I just fell asleep and I woke up late. But I'm not going to put it all on her, but she's great and I appreciate her for even looking, finding other ways for me to get my anger out or get my and I didn't have no anger about my mom's situation thing until my aunts decided to dive their self into the situation and try to steer the situation where it don't need to be steered, steer the situation where it don't need to be steered. So, yeah, again, thank y'all, man, thank y'all.
Speaker 1:I just wanted to give y'all an in-depth of me. This is me. This is Tweez. This is you. Know this, tez. Some people know me as Tez, but this is me as Antoine.
Speaker 1:I'm going to give it to you raw. I'm going to give it to you raw. I'm going to give it to you uncut. I'm always going to speak the facts. There's no lie in that story at all. But again, I appreciate y'all for rocking with me. It's January 13th, so I'm going to have this out today, about to put it out today, as soon as I get done, so I can edit and do all of the stuff.
Speaker 1:But I appreciate y'all, make sure y'all like, subscribe, comment, share, share it to anybody that's in your family or somebody that you know might have dealt with something like this. It don't have to be a mom, it could be a father, whoever, but share this story. I that you know might have dealt with something like this. It don't have to be a mom, it could be a father, whoever, but share this story. I just want to speak on it and I'm trying to pull back a lot of my cursive spirit. Like Pastor Jinger say, the cussing, he's a cussing spirit, he's got a cussing spirit. I'm trying to pull back on that a lot. So, yeah, I appreciate y'all, though for real, because this was driving working this morning I was just like yo man, I got to say something, I got to get it out, even though I put it in my journal. Every day I've been having an issue how I'm feeling. I put it in my journal, I read my daily bread Like I've definitely done it, and before we get out of here, though, I want to give y'all a gym, because I always do gym class. Right, I always do gym class. So here go one.
Speaker 1:Be careful what you say out your mouth, because your mouth is like a weapon and what you spit out are the rounds, and when you spit those rounds out at a person, what you're saying, you can't get those back. So if it's something that's a negative connotation or anything negative, evil, spiteful, whatever you say, anything bad, you can't get that back. You write that out and you send it. You can't get that back. That's still ammunition that you're using to sin. So be careful what you say to people, because we forgive, but we never forget, and like that. This is Relationships Worth More Than Money podcast. I am Tweezy. Yeah, it's been one. Real Thank y'all, though I had to get it out. I had to get it out'all. Though I had to get it out. I had to get it out. Man, I had to get it out, and I hope y'all respect this. Understand it again like comment, share, subscribe, purchase the merch. Oh, how you like me? Yeah, big K-dot muster. Yeah, like that, I'm gone. How you like me? Yeah, big K-dot Busted. Yeah, like that, I'm gone.
